People across all social and economic levels are becoming less respectful, and this is becoming a dominant trend in our society. There are thousands of articles on this topic listing various reasons why it is occurring, and how it is damaging our nations. I submit it’s because we are not being effectively taught the importance of showing respect. Most parents quickly learn that children don’t say “please” and “thank you” unless someone teaches them to do so. Respect for parents, elders, authority and even neighbor was traditionally taught first in the home, and then in our schools, and in our churches. Sadly, this is no longer occurring in the way it should and as a result disrespect is a growing problem in our society. Does this influence us? Yes! When was the last time we acted, spoke, or wrote something that wasn’t respectful? If we are not mindful, we too can very easily begin to slip into an attitude of not demonstrating proper respect.
At times I hear the statement “well they haven’t earned my respect” often as a justification for not showing respect. What is God’s response to that type of statement or thought? God reminds us that honour (respect) should be given to those who are owed respect (Romans 13:7). So, who is owed respect in God’s eyes? If you do a search of the scriptures, you will find four categories of people to whom God says respect is owed: our elders, authority figures, Jesus Christ, and mankind in general.
First, our elders are owed respect because of their age and the experience gained simply through life. The principle for this is found in the Law which includes a mandate to honor the face of an old man (Leviticus 19:32). Nations or people who disrespect their elders are called “hard-faced” (Deuteronomy 28:50, ESV). I would hope that none of us want to be considered “hard-faced” in God’s eyes. In giving instruction to Timothy, Paul exhorts him not to rebuke older men in the same way he would rebuke young men, but to be gentle and encouraging and respectful, as to a father (1Timothy 5:1). Since the experience that comes with old age is a key element in wisdom, to respect one’s elders is to respect the wisdom they can give.
Authority figures are another group in the Bible who are owed respect, including political leaders (1 Peter 2:17), church elders (1 Timothy 3:2), other spiritual leaders (1 Thessalonians 5:12-13), fathers who discipline their children (Hebrews 12:9), parents in general (Exodus 20:12; Matthew 15:4), husbands (Ephesians 5:33), wives (1 Peter 3:7), and even the masters of servants or slaves. Interestingly, slaves are told to respect their masters not only when their masters are good and gentle, but also when they are harsh and unjust (1 Peter 2:18). That is a lesson for all of us.
Jesus Christ deserves the honor and respect of all mankind. However, He was subjected to much disrespect when He walked on this earth. This was especially true in Jesus’ home region of Galilee (John 4:44). Let’s consider this a bit and remember that Jesus gave us a parable about a landowner (God) who sent his beloved son (in this case Jesus) to a group of tenant vinedressers to check on the state of his vineyards. The landowner believed that his tenants would respect his son, but they did not. Instead, they showed him the ultimate disrespect, throwing him out of his own family’s vineyard and putting him to death (Matthew 21:33-40; consider also Isaiah 5:1-7). Do we truly respect our Saviour and properly discern the Lord’s body? Am I a good tenant who truly lives by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God? The warning at the end of this parable is sobering: what do you think the owner of the vineyard will do to those servants, in payment for their violence and disrespect, when he arrives? One takeaway for me every time I read this parable is: Am I too proud to be corrected?
Finally, respect is something that is owed to all of mankind in general, from one person to another, simply on the basis of our humanity. We each bear the image of God (Genesis 1:27) and have the opportunity to be a part of His kingdom. Another parable is told about a wicked judge who did not fear God or respect man (Luke 18:2). The judge’s disrespect for people is a feature of his wickedness in the parable. As true Christians we are not only to honor (respect) our brothers and sisters in Christ (Romans 12:10), but also to respect those who do not believe. (consider 1 Peter 3:15). Earlier in Peter’s epistle God inspired him to write, “Show proper respect to everyone…” (1 Peter 2:17).
Respect involves honoring or showing deference to another person. The word respect here is a translation of the Greek word timēsate, meaning “honor or value.” It literally means “to place a great value or high price on something.” At times the influence of our society can diminish the reality that God expects us to show that respect to everyone.
At times we all need to be reminded of the importance of showing respect. God commands we show respect to all. As I conclude this pastor’s message let’s consider that we read in the Bible that husbands and wives are to respect their spouse; “… and the wife must respect her husband” (Ephesians 5:33). “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect” … (1 Peter 3:7) That same principle applies to all other relationships, we must learn to treat others with genuine respect, or we are not truly following God’s directive to “show proper respect to everyone”. “Incivility is a virus,” Christine Porath, PhD, Associate Professor at the McDonough School of Business at Georgetown University and author of Mastering Civility: A Manifesto for the Workplace, says. “You touch it and unfortunately we often don’t realize we pass it on to others.” Disrespectful behaviour breeds disrespectful behaviour. We need to realize the uncivil, rude and disrespectful attitudes in our society do indeed affect us.
A recent Harvard Business Review survey found that one quarter of the offenders surveyed said that they didn’t recognize their behavior as uncivil, rude, or disrespectful. Incivility, rudeness, and a general lack of respect can take subtle forms and it is most often prompted by thoughtlessness. Let’s consider honestly how we treat others; we are not to be a thoughtless people; the apostle Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 13:5 that “love is not rude”. The opposite of being rude is simply demonstrating genuine respect whether to another individual or an authority (consider also Romans 13:1-7; Luke 20:25). As we consider this topic and how God looks at it, remember proper respect should even be demonstrated to animals; as we find in Proverbs, “A righteous man regards the life of his animal” (Proverbs 12:10). Hopefully we as true Christians learn to practice respect and honor for all God’s creation; and to teach that to our children as they won’t learn it if we don’t teach them. God say’s we owe “respect to everyone” while remembering, “God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son” for each of us (John 3:16). Now that is the highest honor that He can give for all humanity. Let’s be like our Heavenly Father and strive to put away uncivil or rude behaviour and to show respect and honor for others.